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Bacon Needs No Help

Nor Do Band-Aids

A. Salerno Jr. asks, “Was wondering if you are a traditionalist regarding bacon or if you have sampled the world of bacon themed/infused/doused products, if so, what's the best? I tend to get bacon related gifts, so scented band-aids, calendars, clothes, food. The most intriguing was bacon jam. It is surprisingly good on crackers. Best bacon recipe I have experienced is a meatloaf covered in bacon layered with onions.

Thank you kindly for this, A.

I don’t think the sentiment required much elaboration. Bacon, Mother Nature’s fudge, requires no dressing up. It brings to mind a chicken enchilada dish that my wife makes that contains just chicken, cheese, tortillas, serrano, jalapeño, and poblano peppers, and tomatillos. Probably a couple of small ingredients I’m forgetting, but the point is that the simplicity of the flavors was so powerful because they weren’t gussied up in any way.

So we’re agreed. Some things in life may well benefit from the sophisticated layering of complex flavors, or an unexpected splash of exotic color or spice, but among those things I will not choose to include single-malt scotch, Megan’s enchiladas, or bacon.

The perfect image appeared just now on Twitter, thanks to user @JasonDWS. This incredibly on-point pattern is apparently on a fabric available at JOANN Fabric & Craft that might go great with breakfast.

Thank you, A. Salerno Jr., and as always, Muleteers, do please leave me a question in the comments and tell me where you’re from.


I am changing up the format, or I guess just loosening my own restrictions a bit here, as I continue to learn how to fit Substack into my schedule. Some of it is free, most of it, really, but then if you subscribe you do get some powerfully ordinary extra material like this video above, for example, or the racy material tucked away below. Thanks for being curious and joining in my experiment.

The lawyers require me to post #ad even though this is barely ad-adjacent. We launched the 3rd Lagavulin: Offerman Edition 11 year CHARRED OAK CASK last week at the gorgeous Brooklyn eatery in the heart of Prospect Heights, Olmsted, from chef-owner Greg Baxtrom. The restaurant is named, of course, for Frederic Law Olmsted, co-designer of Prospect and Central Parks and so many more. I highly recommend this farm-to-table, seasonally sourcing restaurant, and I can’t wait to be back myself. 📷: The Titular Donkey
Two handsome Scotsmen involved in my #ad world: from left to right, you have Stuart Morrison, master elixir wizard, responsible for shepherding the Offerman expressions into excellence (and the 16 year to boot), and in the middle is the mule typing these words, then on the right is Ewan Morgan, an ambassador of rare and exceptional libations from the Diageo company. I have had worse work gigs. 📷: Sam Stone

Donkey Thoughts with Nick Offerman
Donkey Thoughts with Nick Offerman
Nick Offerman